If you mixed vodka with orange juice and milk of magnesia, would you get a Philip’s Screwdriver?
“I am ” is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that “I do ” is the longest sentence?
Why do blondes get confused in the bathroom?
They have to pull their own pants down.
Why don’t blondes like to make Kool-Aid?
They can’t get eight cups of water into that little packet.
“On the Table”
He laid her on the table.
So white clean and bare.
His forehead wet with beads of sweat.
He rubbed her here and there.
He touched her neck and then her breast.
And then drooling felt her thigh.
The slit was wet and all was set,
He gave a joyous cry.
The hole was wide…he looked inside.
All was dark and murky.
He rubbed his hands and stretched his arms…
And then he stuffed the turkey.
He said… Want a quickie?
She said… As opposed to what?
She said… What do you mean by coming home half drunk?
He said… It’s not my fault…I ran out of money.
He said… Shall we try swapping positions tonight?
She said… That’s a good idea… You stand by the ironing board, while I sit on the sofa and fart.