Archive for March 3rd, 2008


Wyalusing State Park



Confluence 2


Passenger Pigeon

Wyalusing State Park is situated on the bluffs above the confluence of the Wisconsin and Mississippi Rivers.  Prairie du Chien, Wisconsin, founded in the 17th century and one of the oldest towns in Wisconsin, sits below the park.  Hiking here is considered difficult because of the steep climbs down to and up from the Mississippi River.


School Daze Humor

Will the Real Dummy Please Stand Up?

AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months saying he lacked intellectual leadership. He received a $26 million severance package.  Perhaps it’s not Walter who’s lacking intelligence.

A child comes home from his first day at school. His Mother asks, “Well, what did you learn today?”
    The kid replies, “Not enough. They want me to come back tomorrow.”

A wise schoolteacher sends this note to all parents on the first day of school: “If you promise not to believe everything your child says happens at school, I’ll promise not to believe everything they say happens at home!

College Life

A study of 13,000 students in the American Journal of Public Health says those given free condoms in giveaway programs did not engage in more sex than others, and that the notion is unfounded. But they did douse more people with water balloons from their upper-floor dorm windows.

Four Sophomores

    At Duke University, there were four sophomores taking Organic Chemistry. They did so well on all the quizzes, mid-terms, and labs, etc., that each had an “A” for the semester.
    These four friends were so confident that the weekend before finals, they decided to drive up to Charlottesville to the University of Virginia and party with some friends up there. They had a great time. However, after all the hard partying, they slept all day Sunday and didn’t make it back to Duke until early Monday morning. Rather than taking the final then, they decided to find their professor after the final and explain to him why they missed it. They explained that they had gone to UVA for the weekend with the plan to come back in time to study, but, unfortunately, they had a flat tire on the way back, didn’t have a spare, and couldn’t get help for a long time. As a result, they missed the final.
The Professor thought it over and then agreed they could make up the final the following day. The guys were elated and relieved. They studied that night and went in the next day at the time the professor had told them. He placed them in separate rooms and handed each of them a test booklet, and told them to begin. They looked at the first problem, worth 5 points, something simple about free radical formation.
    “Cool,” they thought at the same time, each one in his separate room, “This is going to be easy.” Each finished the problem and then turned the page.
On the second page was written: (For 95 points): Which tire was flat?

According to a radio report, a middle school in Oregon was faced with a unique problem. A number of girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.
    Finally the principal decided that something had to be done.  She called all the girls into the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night. To demonstrate how difficult it was to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to clean one of the mirrors. He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it into the toilet and then cleaned the mirror.
    Since then there have been no lip prints on the mirror. There are teachers and then there are TEACHERS.

My friend likes to read his two young sons fairy tales at night. Having a deep-rooted sense of humor, he often ad-libs parts of the stories for fun.
    One day his youngest son was sitting in his first grade class as the teacher was reading the story of the Three Little Pigs. She came to the part of the story where the first pig was trying to acquire building materials for his home. She said, ‘…And so the pig went up to the man with a wheelbarrow full of straw and said ‘Pardon me sir, but might I have some of that straw to build my house with?’ Then the teacher asked the class, ‘And what do you think that man said?’
    My friend’s son raised his hand and said, “I know! I know! He said, ‘Holy smokes! A talking pig!'”
    The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10 minutes.

    A school teacher injured his back and had to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of his body. It fit under his shirt and was not noticeable at all.
    On the first day of the term, still with the cast under his shirt, he found himself assigned to the toughest students in school.
    Walking confidently into the rowdy classroom, he opened the window as wide as possible and then busied himself with desk work. When a strong breeze made his tie flap, he took the desk stapler and stapled the tie to his chest.
    He had no trouble with discipline that term.

March 2008

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